🫵 Modesty is killing your application - here's what to do about it

Do you feel uncomfortable talking about yourself to others positively? Uncomfortable highlighting your achievements and recognizing your great qualities?

Join the club.

Growing up in an Asian household, I was taught a lot of great things (like how to use chopsticks and speak a second language), but bragging was not one of them. Instead, humility and modesty were virtues, and I was encouraged to keep my head down and keep speaking out to a minimum.

The result? I sucked at selling myself, and this made writing a compelling application really, really difficult.

Sound familiar?

Here's what we're going to do about it.

#1 Write a Tinder profile for your best friend 🔥

Have you ever come across the FB page Subtle Asian Dating? (Maybe nobody uses Facebook anymore...) Anyway, I've attached a screenshot for reference, but it's a Facebook group where people auction their friends for spicy dates with flattering photos and stunning blurbs singing their praises.

Funny how we're a lot better at complimenting our friends than we are ourselves, huh?

...we're a lot better at complimenting our friends than we are ourselves

Anyway. technique #1 is pretending that you're writing for your best friend instead of yourself. It might be helpful to even go ahead and ask your best friend for advice on this one. What are your best qualities? What challenges have you faced that illustrate these qualities? What are your biggest achievements? If your best friend had done all the things you had, how would you make them sound as cool as possible?

#2 Inversion: in an alternate universe...🪐

If flattering your friend is still too tough for you, try imagining a world where you did not exist and the roles you filled were now empty. What would happen? Would that huge conference you were responsible for planning have fallen apart? Would that team you captained achieved the same results without you? Would that humanitarian club you joined have touched as many people if you weren't there?

Then, invert all of the bad things that would have happened. Things that you prevented by being there and doing what you did. You were responsible for all of those great outcomes. Own it!

#3 Be a journalist ✏️

If you're still having trouble hyping yourself up, try a more objective approach. Pretend you're a journalist doing an interview of a stellar student (you). Prepare a list of questions to dig deep into your achievements, your involvement, and your personal qualities. If it helps, have a friend ask you those questions, and try your best to come up with honest, objective answers!